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The Wilson Manifesto

The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie
-- Special Edition DVD

Adam Wilson
filed 12/02/02

the Wilson Manifesto: The Movie - Special Edition DVD features deleted scenes and cast and crew commentaries. There is also a bonus disk offer that features exclusive behind-the-scenes featurettes, alternate endings to The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie, and limited edition glances at The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie -- Original Screenplay. To acquire the special edition bonus disk, send five dollars and proof of purchase to

Deleted Scene 1: Wilson Types (time filler)
Running Time: 8 hrs, 11 min, 56 sec.
MIKE GRADY (director): In this scene, we wanted to show the writing process as a time-lapsed affair. We filmed Wilson for hours as he sat at his computer while he worked. Of course, he didnít accomplish much and the shot was pretty much wasted on that fact. That, and itís hard to show time lapse if you canít see outside or a clock. We were going to use this as a bit of a space filler in The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie. Like most plans involving this movie, they didnít work out too well.

INT. Wilsonís Computer
We see a computer desk littered with papers, CDís and a black coffee mug. The computer screen flickers and occasionally the screen saver comes on. Wilson sits at his computer typing occasionally, accomplishing very little. We see Wilson scratching his head, making it look like heís thinking hard about something, but we all know that he really isnít. (Scene End)

Deleted Scene 2: Wilson Makes Lunch (another time filler)
Running time: 21 min, 33 sec.

GRADY: We had big, big hopes for this scene. We were going to show how this author (chuckle) spends his days while working on his craft. We wanted to have a camera set up in the kitchen, almost like a surveillance camera, to film him coming into the kitchen and making a meal and then leaving. Basically, we wanted to show people that he eats like the rest of us. And we thought it would look cool. As it turned out, Wilson eats all kinds of weird shit and we ended up cutting this scene out after test audiences found it boring.

WILSON: I liked this scene because that meal tasted fuckiní sweet. Iím actually getting hungry right now. I think Iíll go make some lunch. Wanna bring your camera along?

GRADY: Screw you. Jerk.

INT. Kitchen
Wilson walks into the kitchen. He opens the fridge and pulls out an onion and margarine. He grabs a package of Lipton Sidekicks, Cheddar and Broccoli rice and a pot. He fills the pot with water and pours water, margarine and the contents of the Sidekicks package into the pot, setting it on the stove on a warming burner.

Wilson then pulls out a frying pan, putting it on another burner, and pours some frozen vegetables into it with some diced onion and cubed ham.

We watch for many minutes as Wilson stirs the contents of the pot and the contents of the frying pan. Time passes. Eleven minutes and twenty seconds to be exact.

Wilson pours the contents of the frying pan into the pot and stirs. He takes the contents of the pot now and pours it into a large bowl. He leaves the kitchen to eat now.
(Scene End)

Deleted Scene 3: Fight Scene #08
Running Time: 3 min, 18 sec.

WILSON: This scene was awesome. I still donít know why we took it out.

GRADY: This scene sucked. We had to take it out. It was the eighth fight scene in the movie. There were too many in this movie for the kind of movie it was. And what kind of movie it was, I still donít even know.

WILSON: Too many fight scenes? You can never have too many fight scenes.

GRADY: Yeah, but you canít fight. Youíre a pussy.

WILSON: Let the people see. Show them the footage. Roll it.

GRADY: Roll it? What do you think, youíre some kind of director? Nerd.

EXT. Dark Alleyway
Wilson is walking down a dark alleyway when he is jumped by three ninjas dressed in black ninja outfits. The ninjas step forward.

BLACK NINJA 1: First you kill my brother. Now I kill you.

BLACK NINJA 2: Yeah. Now black ninjas kill you.


WILSON: You think youíre going to kill me? No, no. Now Iím going to kill you like I killed your brother.

The fight ensues.

GRADY (Voice Over): Look at this fighting. It sucks. Those ninjas were terrible.

WILSON (V.O.): Those ninjas were really good actually. I found them myself.

GRADY (V.O.): Where did you find them?

WILSON (V.O.): They were on Power Rangers. You know. Those damn putty things that used to jump around and get their asses kicked. These three were puttys at one point in their careers.

GRADY (V.O.): Wow.

WILSON (V.O.): Actually, they taught me most of my fight moves in the movie too. The guy playing Black Ninja 1 was the fight choreographer.

GRADY (V.O.): That explains a lot.
(Scene/Commentary End)

Deleted Scene 4: Extended Dialogue Between Wilson and Little Bill in Diner
Running Time: 5 min, 20 sec.

GRADY: This was one more scene that we had to cut because of bad viewer response.

WILSON: Come on, man. This scene was gold. Pure Gemini material.

GRADY: Why do you think this scene was good?

WILSON: It shows how the character I play...

GRADY: ...yourself...

WILSON: ... is alienated from the outside world and the uncomfortable feelings he gets when heís around other people. Itís quite a powerful and moving scene.

GRADY: (sighs) Right. Well, the test audience said it sucked, so it was cut.

WILSON: Where did you get this test audience anyway? Who were they? Your family?

GRADY: Actually...

INT. Diner
Wilson and Little Bill sit across from each other in a diner. Wilson is drinking a coffee and Little Bill is drinking a tea. They just finished the conversation that appeared in The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie (the conversation about Wilsonís book and the fact that the Canadian government is storing Canadaís aliens at Carleton University).

LITTLE BILL: So, what are you working on these days?

WILSON: Nothing much. Kicking a few ideas around for a new book.

LITTLE BILL: Yeah? Whatís it about?

WILSON: (Takes a sip of coffee) I donít know yet.

LITTLE BILL: Come on. Just tell me. I really wanna know.

WILSON: I really donít know.


WILSON: I donít know.


WILSON: Screw off, Bill.

The two of them sit in silence.

LITTLE BILL: Sometimes I donít even know who you are.

WILSON: Sorry. Sometimes I just feel completely alienated from the outside world and I get uncomfortable around people I donít know well.

(Scene End)

Cast/Crew Commentary
GRADY, WILSON and an INTERVIEWER sit in directorís chairs in a semi-circle. GRADY and WILSON are side-by-side, INTERVIEWER facing them.

WILSON: Where are the rest of the deleted scenes?

GRADY: Who knows. They all sucked anyway. Those were the only ones we could find. Those were the best of the rest. Or the rest of the worse. Or something like that.

WILSON: I thought those were pretty good though.

GRADY: No. They sucked.

INTERVIEWER: Well. Now that The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie is done and finished, what are you working on right now?

GRADY: Well, Iíve got a couple projects on the plate. Iím directing a new feature film starring Jason Priestly, called Racecar Driver, and Iím working on another project with Patrick McKenna, where he plays an accountant who goes on a maniacal rampage. Kind of like Falling Down. But with Harold Green.


WILSON: Well, Iím working on a new novel right now about a rhinoceros that wants to try and become the king of the jungle.


WILSON: Yeah. Itís gonna be sweet. Itís gonna be a cross between Bloodsport and ĎAnimal Farmí.

GRADY: Great.

INTERVIEWER: How did you two get along during the filming of the movie? In the press, there were stories about you two butting heads about many aspects of the movie.

GRADY: Yeah. This guy is not an actor, whatsoever. Heís hardly a writer, let alone an actor.

WILSON: Yeah? Well, youíre hardly a director... let alone a...

GRADY: You got that?


INTERVIEWER: Ok, then. That answers that. Mike. Now that the movie is done and complete, what do you think about the finished project?

GRADY: Well, no matter what shit we went through while making this movie. Itís surprisingly not that bad. Itís not my best work. But itís not my worst.

WILSON (Off Screen): How could it be? I saw your last movie. Frankís Barn. That licked balls.

GRADY: Screw you, amateur.

INTERVIEWER: Adam. What do you think this film represents in terms of Canadian cinema?

WILSON: I think this movie is a great addition to the ever-growing body of Canadian cinema. It is subtle and smart and funny and touching in many different aspects. Itís a magical piece of film. I think it should be taught in colleges for film studies...

GRADY (O.S.): ...Yeah. For a study of poorly written and acted movies...

WILSON: ... Canadian cinema is always pushing the boundaries. And this movie is no different. And to all the critics, except Brian D. Johnson from Macleanís who said it was amazing, you can all screw off. This movie, in your opinion, may be bad, but Iíll tell you this, itís way better than Duct Tape Forever.

INTERVIEWER: So, whatís lies ahead for these two artists? Mike?

GRADY: Well, I have those other two projects I told you about before. Iím working on a screenplay for another movie right now. And weíre actually putting together a behind-the-scenes documentary about the making of The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie. Itís gonna be called An Exercise in Idiocy, the making of The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie.


WILSON: Well, Iím actually working on a sequel to The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie. In this one, the main character, me, gets taken hostage in a Thai prison...

INTERVIEWER: Well, that about raps up this portion of The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie - Special Edition DVD. Now, if you choose, watch the feature film. It has a running time of 91 minutes and is rated R for violence, nudity and sexually deviant scenes. If you live in Quebec, you should return this movie to your video store immediately. It is banned in your province. Also, there is only an English track. So. Sit back. And try to enjoy The Wilson Manifesto: The Movie. (Fade to Black)

Adam Wilson is the author of some incredibly bad poetry, many pieces of short fiction and a novel, all of which, you havenít read. Adam Wilson encourages you to write because he would rather hear from you than get another rejection letter.

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